So, we all know that 3 o’clock feeling. Your retinas feel like that fiery eyeball that hung out in Mordor looking for ring-toting hobbits. Your back aches so much you’re seriously considering proposing to your chiropractor. You’ve been staring at that blinking cursor so long its strobe-lightesque effects have you humming techno music and practicing your dance moves.
You’re desperately looking for any opportunity to avoid the next two hours of drudgery.
But don’t let your procrastination take the form of mindless web-surfing (unless, of course, you’re watching the following videos) or noshing on the unhealthy contents of the office vending machine (Twinkies will only make you feel worse).
Find some like-minded co-workers and get a little workout. Better yet, make it a friendly competition. (Bonus: You can take out some of that pent-up aggression you’ve been feeling toward your cubicle mate for playing Michael McDonald’s greatest hits for three hours straight last week).
Here’s some inspiration for kicking off your first office olympics.
Before you leap into this competition, it might be smart to measure your cubicle walls. Sure, you might feel energetic enough to leap over the 63-inchers — but let’s be honest, the last time you ran anywhere was across the parking lot during that rainstorm. We’re pretty sure workman’s comp won’t cover a strained hammie, or worse, a broken leg because you and your buddies decided to relive the glory days of high school track and field.
Extreme Office Tennis
At last, there’s a sport that combines Chuck Norris’s martial arts skills with Roger Federer’s volleying abilities. And you don’t even need a ball or racket – just a crumpled up ball of paper and your limbs. If you don’t have the same grace and flexibility as these guys, it might be a good idea to leave the kung-fu moves out of the equation and just use your hands to bat the “ball.”
Who says you need a boat, paddles or even water to start your own crew team? All you need are some rolling chairs, a spotter and the ability to propel yourself backward (pantomiming skills don’t hurt either). It’s probably a good idea to find a long hallway empty hallway to practice, and we advise skipping the bullhorn to avoid calling extra attention to you and the team.
Synchronized Chair Dancing
So there are those among us who would hesitate to call dancing a sport worthy of office olympics. But we challenge you to try those tricky side-rolling maneuvers while simultaneously clapping. While we love Michael Jackson, there are way too many “Thriller” knock-offs on the web. Why not trying a rolling version of Lady Gaga’s “Bad Romance?” Your costumes will be sure to amaze (or horrify) your cube comrades.
We’d only suggest starting an office dodgeball game with willing participants. Otherwise, the repercussions of pegging innocent bystanders with balls might leave you dodging a pink slip. And while splashing a scorching hot cup of coffee all over your co-workers suit might show off your superior aiming abilities, we’re pretty sure you’ll be the only one laughing. Keep all shots below the neck.
If you spend your weekends wearing shirts with ruffled sleeves, swigging mead and shouting things like, “Good morrow Lady Merryweather!” then office jousting is the sport for you. Your office chair can play the starring role of your noble steed and any old rolled up tube of paper will do for your lance. Just make sure you don’t try to steal a case from any fair maidens/comely co-workers. That could make things awkward.
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